Category Archives: Mental Diet

20 Seconds of Insane Courage Leads to Possibilities

Don't Just Stand there words on notepad

I was watching We Bought A Zoo last night and heard the most inspiring words:

“You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”

Right on. How many times do we hold ourselves back because of the story we tell in our heads.

“I can’t because…, I can never learn that, I will look stupid, that’s for smart people, what if I get rejected, I am not special enough, my opinion isn’t important, etc.

We can write the story of our lives anyway we want. Taking risks is the way to discovering more about ourselves.

Say yes to more. Try what makes you feel uncomfortable. Sign up for that class. Teach a class. Go to a place you have never been before, alone. Own up to your opinion or point of view.

I think we’ll find that taking that 20 seconds will connect us to more and shape our paths in ways we never thought.

And I find that exciting. Possibilities do that!

 

 

photo:unsplash.com

My Secret to Being More Focused

headphones-heart-ipod-music

Have music on when being creative/working on a project.

BUT only put 4-5 songs in a playlist then press repeat. Those few songs become background noise, which allows for the real magic to happen.

Why just 4-5 songs? Because if you have a huge list on repeat, then you tend to listen for the next song and then sing it in your head, which distracts your thoughts/flow.

It’s a focus thing. By just having a few songs they eventually become background noise.

OR another favorite of mine is to use Pandora.

If you have a Pandora account, free of commercials, then you will want to create a station named Braveheart Film Score. That station plays some wicked awesome, inspiring scores from movies. It really helps get the juices flowing.

Give it a try and let me know how it works for you.

Photo:awesomesnapshot

 

 

 

 

You Gotta Do You

There is No one else like you

People admire transparent/authentic/honest/real people and I truly believe they crave it more today than ever before.

People BS way too much to please others or to hide behind a perceived persona.

Being authentic and real isn’t just a mindset anymore, it’s the way to live.

So, as they say, Be Yourself. It’s totally in.

 

 

Put Your Butt in a New Seat

super-mario-dot-to-dot

I am learning that a lot of awesomeness happens when we put our butts in different seats.

Such as signing up for a class, going to local events or attending Meetups. All good places to start.

Yes, we might be scared to go because we don’t know anyone at these new places. TOO BAD. Just do it anyways. The result of this action is meeting a new person, learning something new and gaining more confidence.

When we keep getting out there, we realize the people in our community are super cool and that we actually can contribute too. Everyone has something to offer. Everyone.

Then, connect with these same folks on social media, especially Twitter. Where we can read their insights, see videos they post, articles they share and learn of upcoming events we otherwise would’ve missed had we not been following them (on Twitter, not in a creepy stalker way).

One connection will lead to another one and so forth. Just like the dot to dot game. And after so many connections, we make a picture. Really think about that.

So, put your possibility-cap on, embrace being uncomfortable and go to an event.

 

image: www.supercoloring.com

 

 

 

Marvel Avengers, Age Of Ultron: It’s Magical

Marvel Avengers Age of Ultron review

The lights go out.

The Marvel comic book pages start quickly flipping on the screen.

The audience members start clapping.

Then, as the movie begins, it seems everyone collectively takes a deep breath, almost bracing ourselves for the ride we know we are about to go on.

And boy was it a wild ride indeed.

We clapped & laughed together. Total strangers enjoying in the moments together.

Movies can make us feel united as people, especially right now when it does not feel that way.

I have so many cherished memories that have to do with watching movies.

My first date with my husband was at a movie theater.

While watching both How to Train Your Dragon 2 and Big Hero 6, my children cried. You know which parts.

My point is that movies can be so magical and touch us on so many emotional levels. It’s pretty cool if you ask me.

Oh and Avengers: Age of Ultron, was insanely fun! smiley

 

image: marvel.com

 

Let’s Not ASSume Or You Know What Happens

Don't Believe everything you think

How often do we convince ourselves into believing that something is true, when indeed, it really is not?

Just because we believe strongly that something is true, does not actually make it true. We have a tendency to make assumptions about a lot of things. Then problems follow.

For example, my husband will come home from the grocery store and I’ll tell him, “You forgot something.” He will then say,  “that was not on the list you texted me.”

“Yes, it was,”  I say with annoyance. “I know FOR SURE that I put it on there.” Then, I will check the sent text and find out that I did not include that one item. BUT boy oh boy, I felt like I did. I would’ve bet money that I put it on there.

How often does that happen with our spouses or others ? Don’t we all make assumptions about how others think about us? Then we feel judged! We can be so crazy in our own heads.

The best thing to do is to obviously not make assumptions and gather more facts before reacting. However, I too have learned that being extremely clear with communication is really the secret sauce.

If we start off with clear communication, ask more questions, then some more questions, get on the same page with others, then we won’t make assumptions because everything is so clear.

Oh, think of the all the pickles and jams we would avoid!

 

Image: unsplash.com

Couples need time-outs too

 Calvin & Hobbes

Everyone disagrees on something and when our voices start to raise and we feel a battle about to begin, it’s time for a time-out.

When my kids are arguing and annoying each other and more importantly, annoying me, I send them to their rooms to cool down.

Couples would benefit from doing the same.

Getting time away during a fight/disagreement is healthy. It gives us each the opportunity to be with our own thoughts. To really think about what the friction is really about.

And honestly, sometimes we don’t even know what the fight REALLY is about until we have space to focus and chew on it for a while. Being alone, for me, has revealed some triggers I didn’t realize I had, that were buried deep inside.

Leaving my husband for the day or for the weekend during a fight, has been extremely therapeutic. I just didn’t know it till after I did it.

The alternative is staring at each other annoyed all day, thinking thoughts like: How can they talk to me this way, I do so much for them, They are not grateful for all I do, etc.

Forget that. I choose life! Living in the Pit of Despair is not an option anymore.

Time-outs work with our kids because they are people just like us.  So, I see leaving or getting a time-out as making a responsible decision to do what is right for us as couples, who just really need a little space from each other.

BONUS:
Those conversations, the ones after a time-out, fine-tuned our marriage more than any other.

Washing Dishes and Programming

gender roles

Last night my son walked past his dad in the kitchen washing dishes to find me curled up in bed reading a programming book.

It’s healthy for our kids to see us not following preconceived rules commonly placed on our genders.

I asked my son what he thought about what he saw. He said, “You can be your own person; it’s perfect to be different. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

Well said, little dude.

Being Self-Aware Saves You Time

Forest

We can look at how people are and admire them but we are truly better at being our honest, transparent selves. Period.

Being authentic and not a people-pleaser saves us time.

Anything else is a distraction and in the end, just someones opinion. We have to say, “I don’t give a crap what so-and-so is doing or what they think.”

Every time we say that, we become more resilient to the temptation to be a people-pleaser or disingenuous. Which leads us to be more self-aware.

Improving our self-awareness is better than money. It’s invaluable.

What does it mean to be self-aware? It’s being introspective. It’s about figuring out what really makes us tick, our strengths, weaknesses, our likes, dislikes, what fills our love tanks, and what depletes it.

If we dig deep enough, it’s just about honesty. Honesty with ourselves.

Others really appreciate it and get to know the real us too. For example, when I meet a new person, I tell them about my new person rule. That I will be very transparent, the real me and they can do the same and that we can have cordial discourse. We do not have to agree with each other just to be polite.

This leads to real, genuine relationships with people and prevents the time we waste with the false front we sometimes display.

You’ve Got A Friend In Me

Woody and Jessie From Toy Story

Ever ask your husband if he thinks he is being a good friend to you? Has he asked you that same question?

I bet if we thought of each other as friends first, we would talk to each other very differently.

Let’s marinate in that for a bit…